2nd visit with the nutritionist

Last night was my second meeting with the trainer. I'm still really bad at everything she had us do, but, DUH -- I've only really been going to the gym for a week. I kind of wish I was doing this on my own, instead of with the magazine, because this unrealistic deadline of a month is really getting me down. It is not enough time for anything! Maybe I'll lose a few pounds, but newsflash: I need to lose about 50 (yes, it's true, I'm admitting it), so it's not going to be all that noticeable in a month. I don't mean to say that I think NOTHING will happen -- my clothes are starting to feel a teeny-tiny bit looser, even though I'm barely seeing any changes on the scale and that's frustrating. But again, I've really only been doing this for a week, and it would be ridiculous to expect more. I'm just saying, that in a month, even if I get the best possible results, I'm still not going to look good in a bathing suit, and I need to be prepared for that. I can't let myself get frustrated and give up after that. Why the hell did they pick me for this? This plan is clearly for someone who just ate an extra cupcake during the winter. My only saving grace, or at least what I keep telling myself, is that they are trying to promote their workout and diet, so if I look like crap after having done what they told me for a month, maybe they won't put me on TV. The point is, I can't tell myself that this will all be over in a month, because it will barely have even begun at that point.

Anyway, working out with the trainer was tough, but even tougher was when she said that we should be doing an hour of cardio a day. If laughing hysterically and rolling my eyes counts as cardio, then I'm set for yesterday. I mean, seriously! I'm doing my best, but I have this thing called a job, and in theory I would like to have this other thing called fun, maybe just once in awhile, and working out for an hour a day doesn't really fit into that schedule. Because -- and this is what frustrates me more than anything -- it's never just an hour. Getting to the gym takes time, especially if I'm coming from work, since my office is essentially on a barge in the Hudson River and nowhere near civilization. And then after work, there's showering, washing my hair, and the dreaded blow-drying. Seriously, if I didn't have to blow-dry my hair, I would probably hate the gym 35-50% less. It takes forever. I usually don't do it everyday, but obviously I have to after an hour of cardio.

I'm trying to make time for the gym by going in the morning, but that's a huge challenge, since there is nothing in the world I like more than sleeping. Last time I woke up at 6am to go to the gym, I promptly went back to sleep. So last night I called my grandmother and requested a wake-up call for 6am, which worked. I did 45 minutes on the treadmill (accompanied by the Rock of Ages soundtrack -- very energizing), then came home to shower and get ready. That's another thing I hate -- showering/blow-drying/getting ready at the gym. First of all, that requires extended exposure to the naked old ladies who roam the dressing rooms. Second, it means I have to spend extra time packing clothes, make-up, shower stuff, etc. So I'm much more likely to go to the gym in the morning if I can go back home and get ready -- though still not very likely. I'll try to keep it up, but it is everything I hate -- waking up early, working out, blow-drying -- all at once and that's a lot.

The hotel I'm staying at this weekend has a gym, so I'll pack clothes and try to hit that up a few times. I'll also try and go tomorrow morning before my flight. It will probably mean waking up at 6am again, but maybe I'll sleep on the plane. I am going to try to go every day, but it's not always going to be easy. Another complication is that I simply do not own enough gym clothes to go every day! (And how am I supposed to have time to do laundry now?!!?) Old Navy is having a 30% off sale this weekend, maybe I'll get more stuff from them. Not that I have room in my apartment for it -- my drawers barely close as it is. (Clearly, in order to get in shape I need more money and a bigger apartment.)

Anyway, after going to the gym today, I met with the nutritionist for the second time and it was filmed. She looked at the Food Tracker I've been keeping and said it looks like I've been picking really good options, but that I could cut my morning snack to 80-120 calories and also give up my Skinny Cow ice cream a few nights a week. I tried to explain that those things are my reason for living. I told her I was nervous about the wedding this weekend, eating-wise, and told her my plan to stick to white wine spritzers or vodka and soda with a splash of cranberry. (I did not mention shots. But obviously they are the sensible, low-calorie option.) I got to say a lot more stuff on camera this time. I don't remember what it was anymore, but I'm sure it was terribly insightful. You'll have to wait and see.

Okay, it's taken me 4 hours to write this because I have been working and watching the Gators lose tragically in double overtime. I don't know if I have said anything coherent, but that's cool. Feel free not to read any of the above.